


Lick it off knives

by rawwrrr (ladyYellow)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Byun Baekhyun & Kim Jongdae | Chen Friendship, Child Neglect, Childhood Memories, Established Relationship, Implied Murder, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Non-Graphic Violence, Smoking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:07:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27344815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyYellow/pseuds/rawwrrr
Summary: When you're not fed love on a silver spoon, you learn to lick it off knives.
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	Lick it off knives

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Gee_is_Loveless](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gee_is_Loveless/gifts).



> We're not a cannibal species. I know there are some civilization that use it as a mortuary ritual, or cases of survivors who had to eat their companions.  
> That being said, and as a scientist, I don't approve cannibalism in other form than the mentioned above.

Baekhyun’s back is facing the source of the background noises, trying to ignore the soft whimpering behind him. He turns on a cigarette just to have something to do.

He enjoys the burning sensation he feels in his throat as he takes the first drag. It feels delicious combined with the tight necklace around his neck. It's heavy and it suffocates him, making it harder to breathe. He sighs in contentment as the smoke abandons his lungs, making him feel just a bit dizzy. It’s been a long time since he smoked something anyway.

Just like that, the gurgling sounds drown until the rain is the only thing he can hear.

He spends a few more seconds, just holding the cig in his hand and watching it burn. He focuses in the burning paper and not in the fact that he’s completely drenched, his fingers already numb because of the cold.

“I’m done here, babe. It’s time to leave now” Baekhyun nods when the deep voice calls him, but he doesn’t turn around. Instead, he waits for the other to come as he turns off the rest of the cigarette against his shoe and keeps the rest of it to throw it away later. It would be very careless to leave his DNA behind. As soon as the other man reaches him, he wipes away something of his face “You have blood here, gorgeous” Baekhyun sighs.

“And whose fault is that?” the deep laugh makes a weird echo in that abandoned place.

“Sorry” Baekhyun knows he’s not sorry at all. He uses the sleeve of his own hoodie to clean the blood from his cheek and he curses out loud, complaining this will be a pain in the ass to clean. The other laughs again.

Honest to himself, Baekhyun knows this is just his fault. And he knows his little tantrum will end badly soon, in one way or another. Jongdae told him thousands of times that he was getting into dangerous territories, but Baekhyun was too concerned to fill his parents' void to care about his sense of self preservation.

  
  


_Byun Baekhyun was born from a renowned couple of lawyers, the best lawyers money could get in South Korea Their reputation had them in a very privileged place, as their brand was responsible for hundreds of cases. This means Baekhyun grew up having everything. The safest place to live, the nicest clothes and the most popular toys, the best education, the finest meals._

_Baekhyun grew up well educated, even when his parents were well aware it was a possibility that Baekhyun wouldn’t choose to be a lawyer like them. His mother procured to inscribe him in every possible extra activity she could find, name it sports (like hapkido, swimming and archery), arts (like piano, dance classes and painting classes), languages (Japanese, Chinese and English were only a few of them) and life abilities such like cooking, driving and etiquette classes._

_His father, on the other hand, wanted his son to be independent as well as refined. He made sure he learned his way around engines or things to fix. He was good at repairing and building stuff._

  
  


"Are we going to drive back to Seoul?" he asks in a soft voice as they walk to their car, at the beginning of the road. It's a ten minutes walk back there, and Baekhyun wonders why they bother to hide at all, he made sure to find a place no one would find.

"Why? Do you miss home already, sweetheart?" he answers with a soft accent. The man, taller and more muscular than Baekhyun, is carrying a black bag with the required stuff and some extra, for them.

"No, I just want to spend the night in a bed for a change. Don't get me wrong, the car is awesome, but it's not designed for sleeping" Baekhyun bites his tongue to refrain from saying that it will be easier to skin the stuff in the bag in a room and not in their trunk, at the middle of nowhere, though he concedes it's more private like that.

"Don't be a princess, Baekhyunie. You're always the first to fall asleep" Baekhyun rolls his eyes, for the lack of something better to say.

They keep walking in silence, Baekhyun behind his partner, not as a sign of submission, but as a way to assure he doesn't become the dessert, though he knows the other _loves_ him too much for that.

  
  


_Baekhyun was always at the care of his nannies. Given that his parents were always busy defending people in all the country, they were barely at home. They never spent a whole day with him, not even on special dates like his birthday (which he usually celebrated alone, except for his caretakers)._

_Baekhyun grew up basically as a lonely boy. During his childhood, he rarely spoke to anyone, considered too pretentious even when Baekhyun was nice to everyone and he didn't care about their social position. The other kids just considered they have some better people to talk to._

_The only friend he had was the boy next door, Jongdae, who visited him from time to time. Jongdae was more or less like him, his parents were doctors and they were rarely at home too. He was in almost all the extra classes Baekhyun was taking, so they had a lot of time to become friends._

_Jongdae sometimes invited him to his house after singing classes to play some video games and those were the only times they were left alone, their nannies too busy in Jongdae's kitchen, drinking tea and talking about some recent gossip._

_Jongdae never missed how Baekhyun's eyes glowed with something akin melancholy when he watched some clips of romance on the video games, and it was almost impossible to miss how he smiled, thinking that could be him sometime. Jongdae thought it was weird to fantasize about romances in post-apocalyptic times._

_Baekhyun and Jongdae were around 10 at that time._

  
  


Baekhyun offers fire to his companion when he takes off a cigarette from the package he always brings with him. He waits for Baekhyun to light on the cigarette and then he takes the first drag. A second later, he offers Baekhyun some, but he declines it politely.

"I already had one" Baekhyun never says no to a cigarette, but he doesn't like the shitty brand the other man smokes.

"Always a gentleman, my love" he tosses the bag on the back seat to pull Baekhyun's hand and give him a tender kiss "It's almost a shame you never get to show that shit off, right?" he pulls from the necklace, cutting Baekhyun's air supply for a second.

When he lets go off him, Baekhyun notices the blood staining his hands

"What a mess, Chanyeol-ah" he growls as he takes a handkerchief from his jacket pocket to clean the red liquid from his hands. Baekhyun never misses the opportunity to show off the manners he learned in his classes and Chanyeol, as Baekhyun just called him, enjoys that sight. "Maybe I invite Jongdae over, when we get back" Baekhyun mentions it as a possibility, most likely to not happen ever.

"I am awfully sure he will be delighted with your cooking skills, hyung" Chanyeol smiles awkwardly, not used to that way of speaking, but it just rubs on.

"We learned together" Baekhyun licks the rest of the blood from his finger, trying not to look too hungry. _It's just Chanyeol here,_ he tries to convince himself of his slipping. "Sorry" he ends up saying, leaving Chanyeol's hand in peace.

"Don't be" he kisses him, enjoying the taste of blood from his lips.

  
  


_By the age of fifteen, Baekhyun and Jongdae were sure their parents wouldn't pay attention to them, ever. No matter how bad their grades were, how many complaints the teachers raised against their behaviors, nor the endless visits to the principal's office._

_Reached that point, it was just a matter of seeing how much they could get away with._

_Baekhyun started smoking and Jongdae started drinking. They played video games while drinking beer and smoking, as they talked like always. Baekhyun was still in love with the idea of a Bonnie and Clyde-like romance. Jongdae just wanted quick fucks._

_And it was one afternoon, after finishing a hard mission on Resident Evil 4, that an idea went into their heads, so filled with adrenaline after shooting zombies. They stared at each other, expectantly, hoping the other had the same idea._

_“Have you ever gone hunting?” the question popped from Jongdae’s mouth as if he was asking for the weather. Baekhyun shook his head in negative, and Jongdae felt he could finally teach something to his friend “It’s exciting, my parents took me with them a while ago”_

_“Did you catch something?” Baekhyun was certainly intrigued and Jongdae laughed._

_“No, not really, I’m awful at shooting” Baekhyun tried not to show his disappointment “But I was allowed to skin the rabbit my father caught” Baekhyun held his breathing, waiting for all the bloody details._

  
  


“Are you sure you don’t want to invite your friend over?” they are already in the car, Baekhyun turns on the engine when Chanyeol closes his door. He hands him his handkerchief so he can clean the blood from his hands, but Chanyeol refuses it and chooses to lick it instead. Baekhyun doesn’t say anything, even when he thinks it’s disgusting.

“You are certainly a pig, darling” Chanyeol laughs, because he loves to piss off his lover “And no, I will not invite him over. He made it very clear that he did not want anything to do with the process of getting the _goods,_ he is just the receiver end”

“Ah, it’s not funny to get your dinner from delivery, when you can just get it yourself, don’t you think so?” Baekhyun doesn’t dignify him with an answer, because he also doesn’t like getting the _dinner_ himself.

  
  


_Baekhyun ended up studying law, as well as Jongdae ended up studying medicine. He did it because he sought their approval, their recognition as an equal, a proud representative of the Byun family. He wanted them to reward him with their love._

_Maybe, if he became a lawyer, he could work with them, side by side, and only then he would be visible. If bad behavior didn't take him to them back in highschool, then it's probably good behavior and good notes would do it._

_Baekhyun’s sole idea was to be a good lawyer and prove to be worthy of his parents' attention._

_In their second year, Baekhyun met Chanyeol, who was in Jongdae’s classes at the university. They met at a party in Jongdae’s building and they did an instant click. Chanyeol was everything Baekhyun looked for: he was charming, a true gentleman, attentive and delicate all surrounded by a bad boy appearance. He seemed too interested in Baekhyun too._

_They chatted for hours, instead of getting drunk with the others. Chanyeol didn't back out when Baekhyun offered him fire for his cigarette._

_"There are just a few people who know etiquette these days"_

_"Tell that to me. I hope it does not bother you too much. It is hard to get rid of something that has been rooted in you for years" Chanyeol chuckles._

_"It's hot, actually"_

_“I am leaving, Jongdae-yah. Chanyeol is going to take me home” he said and Jongdae’s drunk face twisted from a smile to a frown._

_“You better know what you're doing, hyung. He’s not a good person” Jongdae could get rid of his formal way of speaking._

_“As if both of us are” Baekhyun didn’t let Jongdae tell him something else. He turned around and walked to Chanyeol, who was waiting for him at the door._

  
  


Baekhyun drives in silence, not turning on the radio. He isn’t paranoid, just precautious. He doesn’t want anyone following them, even when it’s too late and they’re too far from civilization.

“Have you spoken to your parents?” Baekhyun snorts, humorlessly.

“Is that supposed to be an ice breaker?” Chanyeol remains silent “No, I have not spoken to them in a while" he focuses his eyes on the road, not wanting to listen to his ridiculous questions.

“But they have called you, _right?”_ Baekhyun refrains from slamming the car brakes and hit Chanyeol’s head, because that’s not refined at all.

“Is this another one of your twisted ways of torturing me? You know they do not call me at all, they barely acknowledge my existence. I highly doubt they know I am not in Seoul right now”

“Stop here” Baekhyun frowns since they’re in the middle of nowhere. Chanyeol pulls from the necklace, and Baekhyun gasps “Now, Baekhyun” Baekhyun stops the car and Chanyeol lets him go “Now, that’s a good boy” Chanyeol slides his hand over Baekhyun’s thigh slowly, soothingly. _I’m here._ It’s all the reassurance love-deprived-Baekhyun needs.

“I’m sorry” he mumbles, as an apology but Chanyeol kisses him, effectively shutting him up. They deepen the kiss at Chanyeol’s command, when he licks Baekhyun’s lip, asking for permission. Then, their tongues twist around each other, over their teeth. Baekhyun wants to touch Chanyeol so bad...

He must have read his mind, because he slides up his hand, rubbing his crotch, noticing how hard he's getting. Baekhyun shivers under Chanyeol's touch. The taller one takes his other hand to Baekhyun's mouth and offers him two of his fingers to suck them up.

Baekhyun licks at them tentatively, still tasting the blood that wasn't removed properly. He closes his eyes.

"You're doing great, Baek. Do you want some more? Do you want me to _love you?"_ Baekhyun wants to, he wants all Chanyeol has to offer to him, because it has been better than what his parents offered him, anyway. "Answer me, gorgeous"

"Yes, yes. _Love me,_ please"

Chanyeol gets out of the car to take Baekhyun to the back seat, over the black bag that reeks of blood and dirt. He doesn't care. Chanyeol is tender even when he's breaking him.

"You're always so proper, Baekhyun. A true gentleman" he says as he undresses him and opens his legs to push those two fingers inside him. Baekhyun loves the praises, _all the praises his parents never gave him._ "Doing so well for me" recognition as he fucks himself on Chanyeol's fingers, _like the one he should have got from his parents when he graduated,_ only this time is for holding his moans as his prostate is abused "So lovely, so good to me" even if it's for all the wrong reasons, all covered in residual blood, semen and saliva, Baekhyun likes to be good to someone, _anyone._

"I'll drive us from here, Baekhyunie. You should rest, there's work waiting for us back home"

  
  


_Chanyeol put a piece of meat on Baekhyun’s mouth, under the attentive gaze of Jongdae. He didn't get to ask what this was about and he just chewed it, trying to decipher the flavor, but it didn’t taste like anything he had ever tried, not even the exotic animals Jongdae made him try from time to time._

_“What is this?” he kept chewing, the texture wasn't something he recognized either._

_“You like it?” Chanyeol asked, not answering his question. Baekhyun looked away and he stared at Jongdae, but he didn’t offer any enlightenment. He chewed a bit more, just then recognizing the taste of blood. It wasn’t bad, just..._

_“You should have used some pepper, Jongdae-yah. A bit tasteless, if you ask me”_

_“You like it?” Chanyeol repeated. He swallowed it whole, Jongdae's and Chanyeol's eyes shined. Baekhyun felt something was off._

_“Yes” Baekhyun finally conceded “What was this?”_

_“Our kinky patient’s hand” all the color drained from Baekhyun’s face. He was speechless. "He had an amputation kink, the sick bastard. He didn't need to have his healthy hand removed but he paid for it and that's what he got. We thought this was the best opportunity show you this delicatessen"_

_"Are you fucking out of your mind?!" Baekhyun never swore, but he was too disgusted to think about his manners "Cannibalism is penalized here- Oh fuck, we're all going to jail... Why the fuck do you think it was a good idea to give me a human hand to eat for dinner?!"_

_"It's not a big deal, hyung" Jongdae offered "As long as you get it from legal ways, it shouldn't be a problem. You're a lawyer, you must know that"_

  
  


“Jongdae didn’t ask for any organ this time? Really?” they’re on the road again, Baekhyun in the co-driver seat.

“No, he specifically said that he wanted the ribs, we could do whatever we want with the rest” he mumbles, with his eyes closed. He's now satiated, which means he doesn't care what he did to get what he wanted. Sure, the guilt comes later, but he doesn't find it in himself to care right now.

In his love-deprived stated he no longer tells right from wrong nor white from black. As long as he gets love from Chanyeol or Jongdae back for what he does, he would kill his parents and offer them to his lover and friend in a soup if that's what they want.

“What a waste of a wonderful specimen” Chanyeol regrets. Baekhyun knows this is his rational mind speaking.

“Do you know any other surgeon to take them a human heart? Where would you tell them you got it, uh? Do not be absurd, Chanyeol-ah. They will arrest you for trafficking organs right away” he says sarcastically. Chanyeol takes it with humor since he laughs.

“Well then, do you, for any chance, know how to cook a heart, baby? I don’t want to throw it away like the rest of that delicious meat” Baekhyun doesn't scream at himself for all the red flags this whole conversation gives him because he's too happy filled with Chanyeol's white hot seed and plugged in.

He doesn't care that they kill, not only when Jongdae needs organs for some of his patients, but also when he wants to surprise his girlfriend with a fancy dish. Chanyeol, a fucking _doctor_ _working in ER,_ kills to save other lives and to spoil _him,_ a fucking _lawyer._

“I know one, but the recipe will not like you. It is better to give it to Toben” Chanyeol pouts, but he nods.

They eat human meat, they _kill_ for human meat and Baekhyun gets along with it, just because Chanyeol is the only one showing him the love he thinks he deserves, _the love he wants._ The love his parents have never showered with.

“You’re the expert here, sweetheart. My wonderful baby, the one I love until hell tear us apart” he presses a kiss on Baekhyun’s hand, Baekhyun limits himself to smile, melting once again in the blur of his own post-apocalyptic romance.

**Author's Note:**

> My dearest Gee, I offered her a Halloween story and she asked me to write a gorish sad tragic story for her. I found this phrase and I wanted to use it as a prompt. ~~I hope you're happy now >:(~~  
> I'm now more confident in writing angst, but I still struggle with it. So, any feedback will be gladly welcome, as it seems that I'll probably be writing it for her frequently.
> 
> Well, hopefully you liked this... Somehow (?)  
> Anyway, if you reached until here, thank you so much for reading ❤️❤️


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